Wednesday, February 27, 2013

It has only been one week.

I stopped blogging while I was in Ecuador..
a. because when I wasn't at shift I was too tired/lazy to do anything else 
and b. because I had so much to say but no words to explain what I was feeling.

But I'm home now.
And I've had a little time to try and sort out my thoughts. 

I miss my kids.
I miss waking up every single day knowing I would see the kids that made my day better.. no matter what.

I would give anything to see them right now.

While I was in Ecuador..
I woke up every morning at six am.
I worked long days.
I changed unbelievable amounts of poopy diapers.
I fed messy, messy, sopa.. way too much sopa. (soup that they feed them twice a day.)
I dressed kids in cute clothes just to change them out of them an hour later.. due to them spilling something.
I went to the Equator.
I gave lots of hugs and kisses.
I got lots of hugs and kisses... most of which were full of boogers and slobber. 
I watched a lot of barney, dora, and baby einstien.
I tried to understand spanish.
I tried to speak spanish.
I failed.. at the whole spanish thing. 
I cried.
I went ziplining, and rafting down an ice cold river.
I got so many bug bites.
I handed out presents on Christmas.
I spent a lot of money at the local market.
I took a lot of taxi rides.
I saw a lot of people peeing on the side of the road.
I got homesick.. and wanted to be with my family during the holidays.
I watched a lot of Grey's Anatomy.
I cleaned up throw up several times.. and tried to keep myself from throwing up while doing it.
I wiped a lot of noses.
I fell in love with these children.
I ate a lot of delicious fruit.
I lost touch with a lot of friends.
I learned a lot about motherhood. 
I made a lot of bottles.
I had no idea how I would one day leave these kids.
I lost a close friend.. and didn't know how I would keep going.
I turned to God.. and let him take over.
I saw poverty.
I got angry that these kids don't have families. 
I got angry that I couldn't do anything to change that.
I got angry that I had to leave them.

and the day came that I had to leave.
that day was a complete blur. 
I said my goodbyes.
Gave a lot of hugs, a lot of kisses.. and said "i love you" over and over.

And now I'm home..
And I know now.. that I have a new outlook on life.
I have been given more than I deserve.
I have been given the ability to love.. which should be over exercised.
I have been given a family.. to love.
I have been given a home.. to find comfort in.
I have been given the chance to meet these angels.. to learn from them.. and share what they have taught me for the rest of my life.

I went there to help them.. 
To make a difference in their lives.
Boy, was I wrong.
They did more for me than I could have EVER done for them.
They are far stronger than I am. 
They are the biggest blessing in my life, and I promise to love them forever. 

Miss my kids so much already, and it has only been a week.

1 comment:

  1. Love this. You're always going to be able to look back on these past few months with a genuine smile on your face knowing that while you could have been anywhere, doing anything else, that you spent that time so wisely, where you were needed, having your life changed and making an impact on the children's lives.