belief.

I don't care what you believe in.

I don't care if your God is different than others.

I don't care how you start your prayer or how you end it.

I don't care if you pray at all.

I don't care if you believe in science, love, or junk food.

I don't care if you go to church on Sunday.

I don't care if you go to church on a Monday, Saturday, or Thursday.

I don't care if you don't go to church at all. 

I don't care if you are unsure of your beliefs, at the moment.

I don't care if the only thing you believe in or know for sure is that the sun will come up tomorrow. 

I really don't think it matters what we believe, if we believe the same things, or who believes the right or wrong thing. I don't think any of us are in a position to decide who believes right and who has faith in the "wrong" things. 

But this much I know for sure, believing in something.. it changes people. There is a light in the eyes of those that believe in something. As I have gone throughout my day today I've really tried to think of my beliefs. What do I, Annie, believe in. 

These are some of the things I came up with, for today:

1. I believe in good people. I believe that the world is full of honest to God, good people. I think that far too often, we forget that we are those good people. We let other things cloud our judgement and we forget. Though sometimes we do forget, I believe that deep within all of our hearts, there is goodness, and when we strive to let that goodness shine we reveal more of our true selves. I am so grateful for that. 

2. At this point in my life, I can't say I believe in one church. I don't think that there is one specific church that holds all of the truths or has all the answers. Sometimes I think the whole religious concept is such a far off, made up, joke.. but that is just when my over analyst side comes out. I believe that religious people are great. There is something that is touching to me about those that devote their entire lives to their religion. Whether that is serving a mission for your church or the sweet nuns that devote their lives to raising orphans. It doesn't matter what church/religion your actions come from, as long as you are devoting your life to making the world a better place, that is what I have immense respect for. 

3. I believe in love. Not necessarily the.. fall in love, happily ever after love, though that's great too. But, the kind of love I'm thinking of, is the love that changes the world. The love that comes from so far down in your soul.. the pure love. I think that if every kid was raised by loving parents, this world would come to know some kind of peace. I think that if LOVE was the go to emotion.. that if love was our default emotion, rather than anger or contention, our world would be an entirely different place. I know without a doubt that the people that are so damn hard to love... really are the ones that need it most. I know that there are people in this world that have aching hearts, that need peace and love in their life, but have no idea where to turn or how to ask for it. I know that there is some kind of heart ache and pain that only honest love can fix. I know that giving and receiving love is the most incredibly, satisfying, feeling in the world. I believe in love and wish we all could realize how much practicing love, could change things.  

4. I know that there have been times that I have felt unable to move, unable to look forward to the next day. I've felt alone, sad, and unaware of how to keep going. I have an easy life, but I have felt these things. I have felt a fraction of pain and hurt, than most have.. but I know that the only thing I could do at those moments, was force myself to believe in something more. I believe that if you tell yourself there is nothing to live for, there isn't. But what a lie that is. You have to believe in something more. You have to put every ounce of belief that you can muster, that the sun will rise, and things will get easier. You have to. The second you chose a negative mindset, that is what will follow. As soon as you forget to believe, you slip. I have had to tell myself.. I don't know why. I don't know why I would believe in something.. but I have to. Even if it might not be there. Even if there might not be anything out there. Even if God is made up. Even if this whole life is a made up, lie.. I have to believe in something.. because that is my only option. The second you stop believing in something is the second you become utterly lost. 

So believe in something. What ever you can, just believe wholeheartedly in it. Believe in a religion, love, that there is good people out there, that we live in an incredible, good world, or a God, anything. I've lost people because they couldn't muster a minute of belief that things will get better. There are people in my life right now that I'm terrified of losing to disbelief. There is someone that I'm writing this to, simply because I need them to believe that things will get better. I don't care if you believe in cement, clouds, or candy. I don't care what you believe. I just need you to believe in something, believe that there is more than the pain you feel right now. I believe there is good out there, I believe there is something to live for, I believe that all beliefs are correct.. that there isn't such thing as the wrong beliefs.. because what ever God, higher power, big bang theory, or freaking religion you believe in.. you're right. Believing in something pushes us to be better. Pushes us to strive for more than we are.. and that is the best thing we can be doing. Believing in something reminds us that we are alive.